J Cat, how could you??

J Cat is an indoor cat. She doesn't have front claws. I got her that way, but truly appreciate that about her. Out of fear, I never let her outside without me being there to keep an eye on her or any stray cats that wander through the neighborhood. One day, while discussing this for some unknown reason, a friend informed that cats fight with their back claws, so that changed everything in my mind. No longer would I have to chaperon her outings on the front porch or back yard. She could roam free...as long as it wasn't beyond those two areas. I thought we were good to go until one sunny, warm afternoon I went out to the back yard to check on her, and there she was laying down next to a neighborhood cat. They looked pretty cozy and all, but I'm just not ready for J Cat to date. She's only 6...or 7? I really don't know how old she was when I got her. Either way, I'm not ready for this. Let alone the fact that she's black and the neighborhood cat is solid white. I can't imagine the uproar this could create. Good thing she's neutered!

An "If" for girls

A friend grew up with this poem on her wall. It's something I would like to strive towards, and hopefully teach any future daughters of mine how to do.


An “If” for Girls

by Elizabeth Lincoln Otis

(With apologies to Mr. Rudyard Kipling)
If you can dress to make yourself attractive,
Yet not make puffs and curls your chief delight;
If you can swim and row, be strong and active,
But of the gentler graces lose not sight;
If you can dance without a craze for dancing,
Play without giving play too strong a hold,
Enjoy the love of friends without romancing,
Care for the weak, the friendless and the old;

If you can master French and Greek and Latin,
And not acquire, as well, a priggish mien,
If you can feel the touch of silk and satin
Without despising calico and jean;
If you can ply a saw and use a hammer,
Can do a man’s work when the need occurs,
Can sing when asked, without excuse or stammer,
Can rise above unfriendly snubs and slurs;
If you can make good bread as well as fudges,
Can sew with skill and have an eye for dust,
If you can be a friend and hold no grudges,
A girl whom all will love because they must;

If sometime you should meet and love another
And make a home with faith and peace enshrined,
And you its soul—a loyal wife and mother—
You’ll work out pretty nearly to my mind
The plan that’s been developed through the ages,
And win the best that life can have in store,
You’ll be, my girl, the model for the sages—
A woman whom the world will bow before.

Can't stop!

Through the course of trying to lose my extra weight and keep it off for good, I learned something pretty important. Losing weight for me was always a race with a finish line. I knew how much I wanted to lose, and I had a time frame to do it in. Since I had an end in sight, it was alot easier to deny myself everything I thought had put me at the weight I was, and then I just needed to bust it in the gym to burn it off faster. Every time I made it to the finish line. I ran through the ribbon and enjoyed all that I accomplished, but then I went to the sidelines until the weight caught up with me again and left me with no choice but to enter a new race.

The past 10 months has been much different, and I've been much happier. I stopped signing myself up for weight loss races, and I decided to make this a never ending marathon. Of course, I took a pit stop here and there. Most of December ended up that way. I kept a good grasp on what I put in my mouth, but didn't feel the urge to exercise, and by the end of December I didn't like the way my body felt or how my clothes were fitting. What had finally started to firm up wasn't feeling too firm, and what was starting to lean out, wasn't as lean.

As much as I want to run the race for a month or two or even three, I can't run short distances. Short distances keep me on the yo-yo diet cycle, and I'm tired of that. I have to run a marathon. I have to keep pressing on and changing things up year round. It stinks! It really does. I wish I was the kind of girl that could do the bare minimum, but I wasn't good to my body for most of my life, and now I have to make up for that. After only a week past that month long pit stop, I already feel the not-so-firm, firming back up, and I can see the less-than-lean, leaning back out. I love it! I love the way I look already. I love the way I feel, and I'm so glad I finally learned my lesson. Let's just hope I can keep my pit stops to a week from now on.

Resolutions

My usual resolution is for the new year to be better than the last. I tend to be successful at it, so why change things up? This year will bring my 30th birthday so I have even more reason to make it better than the last.

It's so important to me to have growth in my life whether it's spiritually, mentally, emotionally, or physically. When I get stagnant, I get restless, and I'm not a fan. The good thing is I have so much room for growth. We all do. We will never be perfect, and we will never be who God has intended us to be until this world is perfect again. Maybe that's a downer, but I think it's a great challenge. Every day I get to be one step closer to who I was made to be. I'm sure I waste plenty of days through my laziness and procrastination that I can't seem to kick.

I know who I am at 29 is not who I was at 19 or 25, and I'm really glad. This year I ran 16 miles without stopping. This year I let go of the control and fear that was holding me back and let God make something new and exciting happen in my life that I get to enjoy every day. This year I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried to be the friend to those that were going through times I couldn't even imagine. This year I decided the dream I kept putting off needs to happen much sooner, and hopefully it will be in my grasp by the end of next year. I like what I accomplished this year and I like the 29 year old me. Now, I'm looking forward to the 30 year old me.

Here's to growth, challenge, and great times ahead for 2011...now if only my resolution to save money was an easy feat!! One of these days it'll happen.

Smoking Mountain Christmas

Sort of...more like Broken Bow Christmas. My family (parents, sis, bro-in-law, and nephew) always celebrate Christmas Eve so the sis and her fam can be with his fam on Christmas Day. This year, I thought we needed to shake things up so we spent Christmas Eve Eve and Christmas Eve Day in a pretty impressive cabin in Oklahoma. I don't really know how to rough it, so while our cabin had a great fire place and lots of scenery, it also had cozy beds, bathrooms, and cable :)

The fam had a great time playing horse shoes, eating, eating, and eating...oh, and opening some presents on Christmas Eve morning. Thank goodness Santa knew we were there!! Without even waiting to be invited Double A was in for the overnight stay, and he had a great time too. Probably because I dropped him off at the local golf course on the way to the cabin. Nothing like a little game of golf to put him in a good mood.

Here's a few pics of our time there:






I hope your Christmas was merry and bright!

Defiance

J-Cat has reached a new stage in her life. I call it cat adolescence. I adopted J-Cat when she was a year old and we've spent the past 5 years together. I know a dog year is 7 human years, but I have no idea how many human years equals a cat year. I can only assume J-Cat has hit her teen years. This has brought up her need to defy me in the past year.

One battle we've been having this week has taken place on the back of sofa. This year for my birthday, I decided to get new couches in the form of a sectional. With Double-A coming into my life at 6'3, I noticed my love seats weren't cutting it anymore. No matter how cute they were (one blue, one beige, with a big red rug tying them together), there was no hope of snuggling (comfortably) while watching TV. So I made a big girl decision to upgrade. Once the new sectional arrived with firm cushions and pillows, I realized J-Cat's desire to be on the back of my love seats over the past 4 1/2 years caused those once firm pillows to have a lovely dip in the middle where she sat. I decided this wouldn't happen with the sectional and had some classy aluminum foil along the back for about a month to deter her from ruining the firmness. It definitely did the trick along with my steady "get down!" commands when she jumped up on the back after her fear the foil once gave her finally wore off.

Here we are, months later, in full adolescent defiance. Last night I repeatedly had to say "get down" when she felt the need to get on the back of the couch. She'd jump down, and jump right back up in a new spot like I would magically decide that was the part I was fine with her sitting on. This morning after waking up from one of her many naps, she jumped up from where she was laying, and looked at me. I always give her some time to jump down on her own since she finds it quicker to jump over the back of the couch as opposed to hopping down from the front and walking around the sectional to get to my desk. After giving her ample time, I said, "get down." She stared at me. "Get down." No response. "Get down!" Still nothing. "J-Cat, Get DOWN!" Nope. So I stood up, and half a second later she jumped to the ground. For the first time I felt like one of those moms getting onto their child..."One...Two...I better not get to three..."

I hope this phase ends soon. Oh, and if you were wondering, the sectional is ideal for snuggling, even if the majority of time its just our heads touching with us each taking up our own side of it.

Giving Thanks

This year's Day of Thanks brought on a "first" for me. Well, maybe a couple of "firsts." Never have I felt inclined to bring a boy along to my family's Thanksgiving gatherings. Never have I asked a boy to take time away from his own family to be with mine. I imagine it's mainly because I never wanted to return the favor and be with his family which would take away time with my own. There was probably a little bit of not really liking/loving the boy enough to bring him along. This year, though, I wanted a boy to be with me and my family, and I was more than willing to return the favor and be with his. I think that says a lot. So A and I drove a few hours to my aunt and uncle's house where everyone was gathering. I was stressed because we left later than we should have, and this here people-pleaser could already imagine phone calls and texts wondering why I wasn't there at the time promised. Poor A had to deal with that stress, and once again, this here people-pleaser kept apologizing to him and thanking him for going with me. We had some good music playing, griped at some East Texas drivers, and then we finally pulled up to the house. As soon as we walked in, I started hugging family, A started introducing himself, and about 15 min. later we blessed the food and made our plates. I'm not sure why I inhaled my food. Maybe nerves. Maybe that people-pleasing stress wanted to be resolved. Maybe just because everything was AMAZING this year! Regardless, when I saw that my plate was empty I was sad that I didn't savor every bite more. Of course I never get too carried away no matter how much I want seconds of the potatoes and casseroles because I always make sure I save room for dessert, and the dessert was even better than the meal. Now that stuff, I was sure to savor, and I still have a few bites of pie left in my refrigerator.

As the ladies were in the kitchen cleaning up, my Mamaw and one of my aunts came up to me in hushed voices bouncing questions and comments my way, "Do you like this boy?" "He's very friendly and very handsome." "Does his like you?" "He seems really nice." I knew he'd be a hit because of all that charm that just oozes from him. It's a bit irresistible. I watched him talking with my Mamaw, I watched him sit down on the front porch and talk with my dad, and I watched him, the only one over the age of 10, play soccer in the front yard with the little cousins.

So I'd say my "first" went pretty well. Oh yeah, that other "first." Well, as my Mamaw put it when I gave her a hug, "I don't think I've ever seen you this thin before." She's right. Well, maybe when I was 10, but I was shorter then. It was nice to hear the positive comments from my family that I haven't seen since April. When people don't see you daily or weekly or even monthly, they're pretty good at noticing changes.

Oh wait, one more "first." Since my waist has gotten much smaller than it has been in the past 10 years, for the first time I rocked a sweater with a belt. Never have I felt comfortable with a belt around my natural waist putting my love handles on display, but this time I thought I could make it work. Maybe I changed out of the sweater a couple of times that morning, but I finally sucked it up, made a few comments to the mirror in my room, and just believed that I looked great in it. I really need to work on my inner voice, I think. It tends to get in the way.